The Hidden Message of Vanity

How recognizing our own vanity can serve as an opportunity for wholeness & Tips for each sign under this Leo Full Moon

Vanity is something I have struggled with my whole life.
From an astrological perspective this makes sense as my Sun is in Leo at the very top of my chart, and my Venus is in Virgo right next door. For those of you who don’t speak Astrology, all that basically means is this: for as long as I can remember, I have always — and I mean always — felt an overwhelming sense that I am not nearly beautiful enough, and that this is somehow a personal failing of mine. Any chance I have gotten, I have compared myself to others, and when I was younger (and to some degree still today, if I’m being totally honest) I assumed that if I didn’t get the role in the play I wanted, or if the boy I liked didn’t like me back, it because I wasn’t pretty or magnetic enough.
When I was 25, during a weekend seminar for self growth, I was able to recognize that these were stories I was telling myself, and that most likely I hadn’t gotten those things I’d desperately wanted because I had believed the fiction and had lived my life as if it were true.
This was an incredible awakening for me to realize that this was a story I had created for myself, which meant I could create another, more empowering version.

And yet, those feelings can still linger and those stories can still stand in my way even if they are no longer as centered on physical traits and how they could be perceived. My sense of vanity has shifted towards what I have been able to achieve.

“Vanity” is defined as having admiration or pride for one’s appearance or achievements, but I think that it often manifests as a desire to be proud of what we look like or what we can do. In this state of desire, we find ourselves working to fill a bucket, the bottom of which is only a hole. The bucket, by design, can never be full. The heights of beauty and achievement can never be enough.
Interestingly, this truth of vanity is written into the DNA of the word itself. “Vanity” comes from the latin root vanus, which literally means “empty.”

So is this then just part of the human condition? Part of what we are meant to suffer?

From a spiritual perspective, the answer is “Yes, and…”
According to the law of Karma, every ounce of suffering in our lives is meant for us, AND every ounce of suffering is a possible gateway to freedom.
When we suffer, it is because some attachment we have to how we want things to be is not being met. The possibility in this is that rather than sitting in that squalor of suffering, we could do the difficult work of releasing the attachment, which is the root of the suffering in the first place. The opportunity is there for us to ask ourselves where they attachment stems from, so we can work it out from the root and learn to feed ourselves the deeper sustenance from which the cravings arise.
For instance, if we are suffering because someone isn’t doing what we want them to do, we can start to see that our pain doesn’t come from the their action or inaction. Rather, it comes from our fear of being out of control, which then may show us that the root of the desire is really a need to feel safe.
So the work becomes about what it is we need in order to feel safe rather than what the other is or isn’t doing.

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What then is the deeper longing of vanity?

The spiritual leader, Ram Dass, spoke regularly of a guide and friend he had come to know as Emmanuel. He had originally met Emmanuel through Pat Rodegast on a radio program, but over the years, Ram Dass created his own relationship with him.
The interesting thing about Emmanuel, however, is that he was not and is not in human form. He is a spirit guide, a being of light, and from this place he is able to relay profound universal Truths.
In the mid 1980s, Ram Dass, Pat Rodegast and Judith Stanton compiled his messages and published Emmanuel’s Book.

In the mornings after meditation, I always read a text or two that remind me of higher Truths, and this morning, I felt compelled to reach for this book. I opened it to a random page and read,

“Vanity is the need to establish
a pleasant connection with the self.
Be patient and gentle with it.
Once you have learned to admire yourself
which, indeed, is absolutely deserved,
then you will go deeper 
for you will have found 
at least the shell of security.

Let me remind you that beneath the vanity
may lie a trap
and you know this one very well.
I point it out to you
so that you can become free of it.
Once you have loved yourself on the surface
and have felt vain in that regard,
there develops the gnawing doubt 
that you are never seen for who you really are,
that you are only seen for the mask
that you have learned to present.

Once you find that your vanity has become a trap
you will begin to let it go
for it no longer serves your purpose.
But never doubt the value of it.
It is only a misrepresentation 
of what you are truly seeking.
But then
if you will stand and look around you
in your world isn't everything?"

How many of our needs are really a desire to find a deeper and more satisfying connection with ourselves? And, if we are able to remember that this is the true desire, isn’t it so much easier for us to be kind to ourselves as we work through all the muckiness and its layers?
Instead of being hard on myself for chasing beauty and praise, I can love myself for wanting to create “pleasant connection” with myself.
Instead of trying to fill a bucket that is nothing but a hole, I can ask myself what true connection to myself would look like, what habits would help grow that relationship, and start mending my own sense of self-worth.

With the Full Moon in Leo coming up on February 12, working with vanity’s deeper message is energy very well spent. After all, Leo is all about love, and what is self-love if not the act of cultivating pleasant connection through total self-acceptance.

with love,
Susannah
Soul Guidance | Intuitive Astrology

*to book a Soul Guidance session, click HERE. to book an Intuitive Astrology session, click HERE.

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Notes on the Full Moon astrology for each sign and Full Moon Divinations below.

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